Right now I am being inspired to continue with some heavy duty internal shifting and integrating it into my every day life. I am also still in the beginning stages of learning what true abundance is – the ability to do what I am intuitively inspired to do only when I am inspired to do it and trust that it will happen because I am intuitively inspired to do it (regardless of any perceived obstacles, like no money!!).
Other than that - I am lost. I read my favorite channelers’ information and I don’t find myself – except for any references to digging deep to re-align or heal even the smallest thing that needs to be changed. I don’t feel called to begin a center somewhere, I have not found my community in my city (I have connected to some online), I certainly am not one of those people who is going to be making a soul match to bring in another little soul on to the earth, I am no longer called to work with the earth grids (or very infrequently), and I am not being intuitively inspired to create new ways of learning methods of energy healing or to write any books or manuals. I am not earning enough income doing what I love, which is helping others in their ascension process. I don’t even want to make art, which, if you knew me, would be a very clear sign of some big shift. I do see some very small outer changes with my income but only because I am willing to do so many jobs that mean nothing to me, some of which actually cause a lot of pain in my body.
Lots of nots.
Am I complaining? Well, yeah, but I am also grappling with the disparity between my incredibly intense and fun spiritual/energy life and what the heck is going on or will happen in my every day human life. I have no idea right now.
Right now. That is the focus for me these days. Right now I am continuing some profound healing and shifting. Right now I am very aware that I need a lot of rest and I am doing my best to allow it. Right now I am embracing even the parts of me that yesterday I couldn’t stand. Right now I am opening my lower chakras even more and integrating all of them beautifully. Right now I have changed the way I manage one job so that it is easier for me (the one that hurts my body). Right now I am loving my body a lot and accepting that, for right now, I have some health issues that must be managed. Just for right now I am trusting that I am more accepting and more loving and therefore my life can only reflect that (even if I want it to reflect it RIGHT NOW).
And that is all I can do and all I am being inspired to do (except write about it).