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Monday, 31 May 2010 01:00

it is worth it

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Tonight I sit here in total awe and gratitude for god and me. I am in touch with satisfaction, calmness, inner peace and joy.  At this moment I accept myself EXACTLY as I am.  I think it is a miracle because:

I am still bigger than most say I should be (in spite of releasing 60 lbs over the years).

I am older than most think is attractive.

My body doesn’t conform to what is considered attractive either.

I dress for comfort, not for fitting in.

I am poorer than most say is comfortable.

I am more unconventional in my spiritual beliefs than most say is appropriate.

I choose to continue pursuing a dream that many have said I should give up.

I also indulge in a passion for making art that doesn’t sell, just because I love it.

Even though I have an MBA I work part time in a call center, and it fits me for now.

I am more apt to speak my mind truthfully than walk away and say nothing.

I never had kids or got married.

I have let myself love men deeply that I knew would not be in my life very long.

I survived two cancers without chemo.

I never wrote the book I thought I would.

I have moved a lot and, with one exception, my closest friends live elsewhere.

I still follow my intuition rather than accepted ‘successful’ marketing practices to build my business.

Sometimes I have no reason for my choices other than my intuitive guidance, and I trust that.

I am well aware of my weaknesses and apologize as fast as I can when those weaknesses hurt others, while I continue to love myself enough to change them.

I am alone a lot for one reason or another.

And yet, at this moment, I am so in love with myself I might burst from happiness.  I am grateful for this moment and all that I have gone through to continue my spiritual evolution and awakening in this human body.  YES, I can definitely say unequivocally and unconditionally, it is worth it.

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