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Friday, 02 May 2014 00:00

Breathe

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Changes are occurring faster than you can imagine now. If you are on the ‘fast track”, and it is ok if you are not (probably saner and healthier) then all kinds of unexpected changes are happening in your life right now. It could be affecting your food preferences, your activity level, your goals, your driving habits, your job, and/or your relationships. There will be change wherever there is interaction that supports an old way of being – primarily one that limits you.

You know this. Haven’t you been really triggered lately by something or someone in your life that before just kind of irritated you but now you can hardly stand it or them? That is what I am talking about.

Just this week I experienced a shock from a change in the way I interact with someone in my family. Our relationship has an element that is based on me creating art for her. I haven’t been able to do it for a few years even though I keep saying yes. I sent her some necklaces recently made from some beads she purchased and she was hurt and disappointed that they were not what she asked for. When I first got the beads (8 months ago) I couldn’t make what she wanted and somehow forgot even what that was by the time I could make them, all because I wasn’t supposed to be continuing to interact with her out of obligation and trying to please her. I felt shocky and shaky because there was such a deep connection within me to wanting her love/approval and making stuff for her. Obviously she has the same deep connection too or she wouldn’t have been so hurt.

At first I couldn’t understand why she was hurt, then as I explored it further I realized it was exactly because she equated my love and worthiness of her love with creating jewelry and other art pieces that she liked (i.e. doing what she asked). I had a fear she would go away without that so I kept saying yes, even has it got heavier and heavier energetically, even as I healed other codependent relationships and ways of being. But we talked through it and I am content now and more comfortable in knowing I am loved and loveable no matter how she feels.

This worked because she was as open as I was and as interested in continuing the relationship. I have not had the same success with others. Only you can know if you are to let go or modify your interactions with someone. But believe me if you try to make no decision or change your actions your higher self will create the opportunity for it to happen anyway. In the meantime, breathe and relax. Know you are not alone and it will be fine.

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