My choice and my commitment have been to live for my highest and best good. I have tried to make each choice from that perspective, until recently. I chose to take a part time job that I knew was not in my highest and best good because I could not heal the inner stress caused by scarcity issues that were showing up as very low income.
And the job looks perfect – hours are good, people are supportive and funny, I laugh a lot, the boss is very laid back, dress is casual, the supervision is hands off enough to be comfortable, I get to talk to people all day, it is close to home, I have no real responsibility and it doesn’t require a lot of effort or intelligence. It seems like the perfect part time job to augment my income while I continue to focus on my true passion – my business and my art.
However, it is not in my highest and best interest. It could be because I attracted this job from the energy of desperation so the vibration has been too low since then (and nothing works when attracted from desperation) It could be because I need to learn to trust without getting a job. It could be I am not ready to be around that many people (in person or on the phone) and I cannot keep my energy vibrations high or clean. It doesn’t matter why, it just is not in my highest and best interest to be there and that is enough.
The shock of doing something day after day that is not in my highest and best interest after years of choosing to do just that is taking its toll. I am tired all the time. It takes effort to raise my vibration at the end of each day. I found myself slipping back into some hopelessness energy. I can’t muster up any passion for what makes my heart sing.
I know I need to leave this job and now I am allowing healing for the scarcity issues that demanded I obtain it in the first place. Although I definitely trust more than I did a few weeks ago, it is still a hard call to decide to follow the highest good rather than the more practical path of supplementing my burgeoning business with a part time job (which MANY people do). I also want to make sure it is not my disappointment that is driving me to this decision – disappointment that my business is taking so long to take off (as I know it is going to) or that I had to get a job for which I have no passion, something I swore I would never do again but DID!!
The truth, as I know it, is once we get to a certain vibrational level of living we cannot stand to be around lower vibrations for too long and the vibration of this job is lower than I am comfortable with. So I am handling this with a lot of prayer and sitting with my intuition until the timing becomes clear. I am also embracing and loving all my scarcity issues in all their forms. I am also appreciating the contrast in vibration as I know that will spur me to choose activities and relationships with matching vibrations to mine.