I have a dilemma. As an empath I often feel what other people are feeling and if I am not paying careful attention I forget that it is their stuff not mine. It happens when I work with clients and it happens with friends. I feel emotions AND physical sensations (lucky me- sarcastically said).
At the moment I have a friend who has helped me through so much but our paths diverged somewhat beginning in August so we cut back dramatically on the amount of energy healing or spiritual growth work we do with each other. I am going through a lot now and desired help so I have been talking to her again.
However, each time I talk to her I am aware of a lot of despair and negativity. I also cough and have other physical symptoms. We laugh about it. When I ask my own intuition if I should be talking to her I get a no but I don’t know if that is the part of me that doesn’t want to heal or the part of me that is aware that I am feeling her stuff and not mine. Because I don’t know if what is coming up is mine or hers. When I am not on the phone with her I do not cough and my mood immediately lightens. Wouldn’t the emotions remain if they were mine? Am I walking around truly feeling this bad but in denial? I truly cannot find the same panic inside of me when I am not on the phone with her. Yes, there is a part of me that thinks I should be panicking but I don’t actually feel like I am. I have been in denial before so my mind wants to go there but something isn’t letting me. I can’t ask the other two people I usually ask because they are living too much in the 3rd dimension and have huge money issues and can’t understand why I wouldn’t be panicking about my finance situation. ARGGH!!
When I have a client I just ask the client if he/she is noticing whatever it is I feel. This person does not feel her emotions or doesn’t talk about them, and, except for the cough, everything I that comes up is emotional, so I do not get accurate feedback when I ask. She ALWAYS says it is what I am really feeling.
So if it is what I am feeling is it ready to heal or is she triggering deep fears that aren’t quite ready – is that why I don’t feel it when I am not on the phone? And if it is not mine but her energy and I am interpreting it as negative emotions, how do I not feel them when I talk to her? Tricky stuff.
There is nothing much I can do about it except pray and intend that I am surrendering to my higher self for healing/transformation because what is DEFINITELY try is that I cannot figure this out with my mind. In my heart I know I want to be as calm, accepting and loving as I can be AND trust that I will create abundance in the physical world and allow myself to be taken care of financially as well as any other way. I am assuming this is a step along the way.