Wednesday, 30 September 2009 11:25

Can't Go Back

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 I had a dream last night of being totally lost in the city I grew up in.  I was trying to get to Taylorsville Rd (a main thoroughfare) but ended up driving far on freeways and still having no idea where I was.  I had maps and I asked for instructions and still couldn’t get there.  I finally stopped and talked to some people who told me I was nowhere near there.  I remember looking around wondering where I was and how I was going to find my way back, when I woke up.

BUT as I was waking up I heard very clearly in my head that I was trying to go back to the place I was and I cannot.  I am going to a new place and I do not have the full directions or location yet, but I am getting there.

I have been struggling more than usual over the past few months.  I made a momentous change, along with the earth’s energy, to integrate more of my higher self into the physical.  I had been focusing on being extremely spiritual and it was time for balancing.  But the struggle, born from intense fear, is that all of a sudden everything felt so different and I panicked.  I have not had the best of times here in the physical world and all those memories came back as soon as a higher version of me tried to settle within the physical body (because the physical body is now clearing at a deeper level and shifting to a higher vibration).  I found myself doing things I used to do  - going to a sewing group, trying some other familiar groups and events – to regain my equilibrium.  I even fell back on an old pattern of trying to connect to some people through complaining – connecting through my wounds as Carolyn Myss calls it.  Luckily both of these people called me on it right away.

So this dream was an answer to my frustrated prayer for help about what has been going on.  I am able to be calmer today.  I would love to have the answers about where I AM going but clearly answers do come in the right timing.  So I am thanking my higher self for the support.

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